Lotusphere 2008 Buzz!

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Even though I’m not going to Lotusphere (and there’s a chance I may never attend again), I’m still caught up in the buzz of it. I’ve done it before, and I’ll do it again… I’m living it thru all of my friends who will be attending. (BTW, anyone want to pick up a C.U.L.T. shirt, size 2XL, for me? I’ll pay for shipping and handling!)

Want to get caught up in the buzz also? Check out a REALLY COOL AND AWESOME website => PlanetLotus.org. It’s your connection to everything and everybody Lotus!

Anyone else have any suggestions for good sites as we rev up for LS?

Lost in a fog

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It has been sooo long since I posted anything, and to be honest, I don’t know why. As I sit here reading everyone else’s blogs (for the first time in a while… sorry my friends) announcing that my friend Paul Mooney and the gang at Blue Wave Technology acquired my other friend Warren Elsmore and the fine folks at BE Systems, I wonder to myself, “Why do I feel so out of the loop?”

I really have had a lot to say… Things I’ve started blogging and things I’ve started podcasting, but as I review it, I begin to delete it all. I think that part of it is guilt that I haven’t been blogging or podcasting. Part of it is that a lot of my rage and anger will come out, and I’ll say something stupid (well, more stupid than usual).

I’m not sure where I’m at anymore, or even what I’m doing in life. All I know is that I love my wife and daughter and that’s about it. I know that for many that is enough, but I used to have a lot more going, but it seems to fade all away. I don’t feel like a contributor in life anymore… just a consumer. For me, that’s no way to live life.

I don’t mean to sound like a buzzkill… I really am happy for everyone else (including the posse at Idea Jam… Bruce and Gayle, Matt, Sean… what a sweet idea that needed to be done!), I’m just not sure I’m ‘there’ anymore.

My blog is back (again)!

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If you read my blog via RSS, you wouldn’t notice anything other than I haven’t been blogging, but those of you (the 5 or 6 of you) that actually visit my blog will now notice that it is back to its old self and is no longer displaying just a dark blue-grey page. Besides backing up when you upgrade templates, make sure you review all of the configuration documents in Blogsphere and make sure that all of the values are selected. One radio button that was not selected kept me out of action.

But I’m feeling much better now…

The job hunt begins in Grand Rapids…

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…but not for me (yet), but for my brother in all things beer and Lotus Notes/Domino, Devin ‘Spanky’ Olson. According to his blog, his contact ends on September 30th. With his talent and skills (and with ‘the Big Guy’s help’), I have no doubt in my mind that he’ll be picked up by some lucky company. Good luck, even though you probably won’t need it!

Now me on the other hand…

Today sucks!

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I found this entry dated March 26th, 2007. The funny thing is that after this morning, it is as relevant today as it was then…

Entry Title: This weekend has taught me… IT’S TIME FOR A CHANGE!
On Friday, I had given up on life itself after what I believe is the worst day I’ve ever had at work. This has been an ongoing thing with me… I’m currently at a crossroads of my life, and I’ve been feeling very lost, both professionally and personally. I’ve been working many long, hard hours (many it seems have not been noticed by anyone but my pride), and have been coming home angry, depressed, tired or a combination of all three. I went home Friday night and cried for about four hours. Something had to change. My daughter and wife shouldn’t be responsible for bringing me back to normalcy every night. Things will have to change… even if it means making DRAMATIC CHANGES that will affect my entire family!

Something’s gotta give, but I’m afraid that it’s me…